Saturday, June 7, 2008

Changing My Mind

Those of you who know me well know that I frequently say things like, "I really don't want to get married" or "I don't need a man to make me happy" and other things like that. I think that whenever I say these things, I am trying to convince myself that they are true. I am trying to, in a way, prepare myself for a life of being romantically unloved. I am maybe even succumbing to what I think others are thinking about me; the fat girl never gets the guy, so why even attempt?

I came to the realization this morning that if I keep saying these things, if I keep putting negative thoughts and energy into the world, I will never find what I actually AM looking for. In reality, I want love to find me and I want someone to share the world with. I want all the cheesy passion and romance you see in the movies. I want to love and be loved and live a modern happily ever after, complete with the arguments and challenges and struggles that can break you or MAKE YOU as a couple.

Trying to be someone who doesn't want love will only prevent me from finding it.

From this point onward, I am going to try to open myself up to the idea of finding love. And I am going to tell the world what I REALLY want from life, not only professionally, but personally. And I don't care what anyone has to say about it.

2 comments:

Gal said...

Here's what I have to say about it: Good for you! Keep bringing into your life EXACTLY what you want. It is ALL possible. Somewhere out there that guy is putting out a similar vision, and your shared visions will pull you together. I will always support your asking the universe for exactly what you want - and life will support that too!

Gal said...

PS. A very wise friend (who is almost 70 and has a lot of years and experience under this belt) once told me that consistency is overrated. We are meant to change our minds... constantly, throughout our lives. Especially if we are changing for the better. :)